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How To Football: Week 4


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It’s Coal, A Big Lump of Rock Shift

  • WVU-VT: Believe it or not, this is only the third meeting between the teams relatively close to each other since 2005. Not only that but it’s sort of an Anxiety Bowl for the Mountaineers, hoping to avoid a disastrous 1-3 start with losses to local rivals Pitt and VT along with Kansas.
  • Coastal Carolina-Georgia State: This’ll be a banger of a game. Watch this space.
  • Chattanooga-Illinois: This one will not be. Do not watch this.

Navy and Orange Shift

  • Virginia-Syracuse: The reports are true; Syracuse is a perfect 3-0. We are monitoring and assessing the situation as it develops.
  • Nevada-Air Force: It’s football.
  • Boise State-UTEP: It’s football.

Tipoff Shift

  • Duke-Kansas: No, your eyes do not deceive you. This is a matchup between a 3-0 Duke team and a 3-0 Kansas team. Yes, in football. I’m not going to get into the College GameDay debate but there’s a pretty compelling case to be made for this game.
  • Maryland-Michigan: SP+ is saying this is a three-possession game for the Wolverines but I’m issuing a Trap Game Alert for the maize and blue here, the Terps can be dangerous.
  • TCU-SMU: There is some palpable heat to this rivalry after Sonny Dykes, on a two-game win streak in the series, defected sides following Gary Patterson’s tenure ending. The hosts are favored, and I feel that the reception will be less than warm for Sonny.
  • Clemson-Wake Forest: Ladies and gentlemen, we have a double Trap Game Alert.

I Hope You Dance Shift

  • Florida-Tennessee: The Volunteers have beaten the Gators just once since 2004, but this year is looking like their best chance to put one over their longtime rivals. Tennessee has looked good against two patsies and needed overtime against Pitt, so a convincing win here would go a long, long, long way for the Vols.
  • Notre Dame-North Carolina: Marcus Freeman is either going to get Mack Brown fired or have a nightmare start to his tenure.
  • Texas-Texas Tech: Not quite issuing a trap game watch here, but we are monitoring and assessing. Monitoring and assessing.
  • Oregon-Washington: #GoodBo made an appearance last week, so by law. he’s about to have a supernova meltdown.

JESSE WE’LL COOK IN THE SPECIAL TEAMS MEETING ROOM Shift

  • New Mexico-LSU: Third September tailgate in a row. Energy and morale are low. Send electrolytes.
  • Arkansas-Texas A&M: I’ll spare my usual spiel about Jimbo being overrated and just say that if you can find an Under 50 for this game you take it and you don’t let go.
  • Wisconsin-Ohio State: Ohio State’s gonna keep this game closer than it should be for the first 25 minutes and then hammer the Badgers in the middle eight. We’ve seen this before.
  • Kansas State-Oklahoma: It’s football.

Robert Kekaula Memorial Shift

  • USC-Oregon State: I’m actually legitimately excited for this so of course it’s being hidden on The Forbidden Network
  • Utah-Arizona State: Goodnight sweet prince. Gone 2 soon.
  • Stanford-Washington: Meh.
  • Wyoming-BYU: Woof okay maybe the night shift is bad apart from USC-OSU.
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