How To Football: Week 6

A MORMON AND A CATHOLIC WALK INTO A STR-

Sippin on Some Syrup Shift

• Houston-Memphis: Memphis may not have the offense they may have had of the Norvell halcyon days, but their defense should put the brakes on Houston enough to make this a game.
• Nebraska-Rutgers: Look man, I get it.
• Harvard-Cornell: It’s football.

Go To Bed Bro Shift

• UNLV-SJSU: This very well could be the game that determines who represents the west in the Mountain West title game. Should be a good game to drift asleep to.
• Colorado State-Nevada: Unlike his one.

Saturday Morning In Death Valley Shift

• Tennessee-LSU: I have zero idea of what to expect from this game whatsoever.
• TCU-Kansas: GameDay will be live from Lawrence, and I must say it’s very well deserved. This’ll be a good game, both teams are willing to do some sick shit on offense.
• Oklahoma-Texas: SP+ finally got wise to this game being the exact inverse of expectations and is calling this a toss-up, which it always is.
• Arkansas-Mississippi State: Another really promising game in the early window. Boy, what a great day this is shaping to be…

Bring Out Your Dead Shift

• Auburn-Georgia: Y’all wanna see a dead body?
• Texas Tech-Oklahoma State: It’s not the over 100 points meeting of yesteryear but should be a decent game regardless.
• North Carolina-Miami (FL): There will be a winner in this game, but only in theory. There will, however, be a massive loser.
• Ohio State-Michigan State: Hmm we started the day well but the 2:30 shift kinda takes a turn. Hopefully the night shift can pick it back up.

Talk Shift Get Hit

• Texas A&M-Alabama: Y’all wanna see another dead body?
• Florida State-NC State: Okay so NC State wasn’t ready to unseat Clemson, but they have a chance to establish themselves as the clear #2 in the league with a win here and that’s still some good improvement for the Wolfpack. Conversely, this could be the win that really puts wind in the sails of Norvell’s FSU to do the same.
• BYU-Notre Dame: [This comment redacted on the advice of ATVS’ legal team. We recommend you watch this game with no further comment.]
• Kansas State-Iowa State: Welp.

Robert Kekaula Memorial Shift

• Oregon State-Stanford: Oh hey, Oregon State finally isn’t playing on the PAC-12 Network. Too bad the game is gonna be dogass.
• Hawaii-San Diego State: You don’t have to watch Hawaii until 2024, just give them time to figure some things out.
• Fresno State-Boise State: Not sure how to feel about this game. Guess we’ll really find out how bad of shape Boise State is in here.